S11E09 - The Puppet Bride

The episode opens with a vignette from two months earlier at Soto’s mountain temple. He has just awakened in the temple’s main hall with no memory, a pounding headache, and a deep, burning rage. The walls are scorched, and on the stone floor in front of him there is an alien-looking seal that must have been recently cast because flames still lick from its edges. Between the seal and him he sees his temple master’s sacred tuning fork and his magical staff, snapped in two. Fresh blood spatters the room. It looks like a massacre has taken place, but there are no bodies anywhere.

Soto explores the whole building and the temple’s grounds but finds no one else. Everybody has suddenly vanished. After eating the half-cooked meals in the kitchen, he brings the broken staff to the master’s room and, unsure what to do, leaves the temple in search of an explanation.

Back in the present, a brawl has erupted at The Laughing Keel after Klik and Klak anger an orc warrior. XV-7 turns invisible and vanishes. The other warforged start hammering pirates. Ike nearly strangles an old pirate who loses the use of his two legs, Lyra knocks a local unconscious and triggers the raven card’s magic from last episode, leveling up on the spot, Brand tries to keep the violence contained, and Soto defends his young goblin trainees from the furious orc. Through it all, the tavern band plays something suspiciously close to Depeche Mode. By the end, the heroes and the warforged subdue the locals, loot enough silver to pay the barmaid for the damages, and settle in to decide what comes next. The battered locals leave with threats of revenge.

While the party recovers, the merchant tells Ike that the wedding is ready as soon as Ike pays the 30 gp arrangement fee. Ike refuses. He wants to buy his wife at the auction first. The others press the merchant to let Ike see the bride before the ceremony, but he refuses. Ike then asks Nemo to paint a suit on him with soot. Nemo abides but refuses to paint below the hula skirt. When they’re done, the party heads to the market for a top hat, wedding rings, and a better look at what, and who, is for sale.

Soto and Nemo spot the merchant among the shops and follow him. After a brief conversation in the market, he heads to the Sunken Shrine of Tide, a half-submerged temple to Fharlanghn, god of travel, whose old stone walls and pillars are corroded by the cursed waters seeping through the land. As the merchant speaks with a sea elf and her helper, Soto approaches the temple from the front while Nemo slips around the back and peeks into the covered box inside. Inside is the puppet Ike means to buy as his wife. Nemo takes one look and hurries away.

The air genasi and the gnome get back to the rest of the party and tell them what they found. Nemo persuades Ike to look for a different wife who looks less cursed than the thing he saw and will probably be cheaper. Ike agrees.

At the auction, Ike bids on his puppet bride. His only competition is the old pirate he nearly strangled. Ike opens at 2 gp and 5 sp. The pirate offers 3 gp. Ike goes to 3.5 gp. Then the pirate jumps to 29 gp. From a corner, the merchant signals Ike to bid 30 gp already. Ike playfully refuses. The old pirate wins instead. Confused, he confers with the merchant and the puppet’s owner. Ike sees a small leather bag change hands. The pirate loudly pays with that same bag, then leaves without the puppet.

The merchant furiously scolds Ike, who explains that he has changed his plans, sorry, and that is final. The merchant promises revenge and leaves.

After the auction, the party explores the rest of the pirate town. Their first stop is the Fog Bell, where Old Peven, a halfling hermit who lives inside, tells them what happened to the town that once stood where Wicked Whiskey Wharf stands now. He also recounts the abbey’s demise on the northern island. The hermit also explains that he’s started hearing powerful, low noises coming from the island. People don’t normally go to the island anymore, but he recommends that they talk to the woman who cares for the acid gardens.

They find her tending a fenced-off stretch of land where warped, waxy plants grow in shallow pools of corrosive sludge and sickly insects buzz in the air. The woman introduces herself as Velka Rootmire, a local botanist and zoologist. She has seen Bert Ratsworth, a handsome pirate, and his friends carrying crates to the island at night. She has no idea what they contain, but the deep noises the hermit heard only began days after the crates left Wicked Whiskey Wharf. Lyra casts elementalism and summons a beautiful sunflower that makes Velka cry with joy. Lyra promises to visit her again and cast the spell, making Velka feel deeply grateful.

After the gardens, Ike insists on going to the brothel to spend the 30 gp he no longer needs for a wife. The party persuades him to first go to the wharf instead. There, they hire a light galley crewed by a man called Paco to take them to the island the next day.